But how? Child-rearing is very taxing, and thru the choices made by men and women the labor falls unevenly. That is not politics, that is reality.

So unless men and women change their behavior dramatically then there will remain an asymetry in the workplace. The move towards 50/50 child responsibilities, with two full-on careers seems a very hard road to follow, especially in professional fields where 80% effort yields on 40% results. SOMEBODY better be running all out, or that team will drop behind quite a bit.

Maybe we will develop into a society where the house husband is just as likely as a house wife. That could work. It would be important to ONLY marry the right counter part, even as type-A folks often marry type-A, this would need to be countered harshiy, or there would be great pain.

I see the problem you outline. I agree if we cannot ask women about children, then it "taints" all women who might have such a plan.

But in the end, the only way it will become "irrelevant" to a business, is if it is "irrelevant" to the future output of the person. and child rearing is not "irrelevant"!